Sunday, March 18, 2007

Sorry to piss on your St. Paddy's day parade but...

St. Patrick is believed to have rid Ireland of snakes but the truth is that Ireland has never had snakes and St. Patrick is also probably a myth. When you tell one lie, it leads to another, I guess.

What he actually did is practice religious intolerance towards pagans whose symbol is sometimes a snake. St. Patrick got rid of a group of people's religous beliefs. Not much cause for celebration unless you are a christian missionary nor right wing rapture freak.

Last night, I drank to the fact that the Pope no longer has domination of Emerald Isle, and my Irish brothers and sisters.

Irish Toast

May your glass be ever full.
May the roof over your head be always strong.
And may you be in heaven
half an hour before the devil knows you're dead.

Here's to me, and here's to you,
And here's to love and laughter-
I'll be true as long as you,
And not one moment after.

Here's to you and yours
And to mine and ours.
And if mine and ours
Ever come across to you and yours,
I hope you and yours will do
As much for mine and ours
As mine and ours have done
For you and yours!

Health and life to you;
The mate of your choice to you;
Land without rent to you,
And death in Eirinn.

Here's a toast to your enemies' enemies!

When we drink, we get drunk.
When we get drunk, we fall asleep.
When we fall asleep, we commit no sin.
When we commit no sin, we go to heaven.
So, let's all get drunk, and go to heaven!

Here's to a long life and a merry one.
A quick death and an easy one.
A pretty girl and an honest one.
A cold beer—and another one!

Here's to our wives (or husbands) and girlfriends (or boyfriends):
May they never meet!
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